The Gateway to Meaningful Intimacy

The Gateway to Meaningful Intimacy

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There is a battle for your heart, your spouse’s heart, and the covenant of marriage. Your heart is under attack. Her heart is under attack. Your marriage is under attack. 

Based on my subjective data asking men over the years about 60% of men do not pray regularly or frequently with their wives. 

It is time to assassinate spiritual complacency and conquer the emotional, spiritual, and sexual divide.

I recorded a short video series last year about being a Champion Husband in Five Days. On day four I shared about how to pray with your wife and begin to open your heart up to hers in new ways. 

Leading marriage expert John Gottman would call this action a bid. A bid is anytime you turn towards your spouse which builds emotional connection and trust. 

Every time you turn toward your partner in response to an emotional bid, you invest in the health and security of your relationship.

This sense of security — of feeling truly able to know and be known by your partner, created by intentionally and consistently turning toward your partner — deepens your shared sense of intimacy and is correlated with an increased relationship.

John Gottman

As a follower of Jesus in the Kingdom of God praying with your spouse is more than a bid. It is declaring war. We are in a spiritual battle, and when we choose to engage with spiritual armor, we choose to go to war with the enemy against our marriage. 

Your covenant marriage is under attack every day. Will you choose to engage in the battle? 

Not sure where to begin? See the above link for a brief video and then use this prayer to read over your spouse.

There is a direct and divine mystery of spiritual intimacy and sexual intimacy. You can have sexual intimacy without spiritual intimacy, but in my experience, you are swimming in the shallow end of the pool if you only tap into one of these experiences together. It’s time to dive into the deep end of the pool and let go of your interdependence and trust God to take your marriage into new territory.